Then comes baby in a hunting-themed carriage

11 Aug

If you happen to get lucky on your hunting honeymoon after your hunting wedding, you’ll know how to decorate the nursery immediately.

You see, babies, perhaps overly innocent in nature, need to be prepared for the hard world of hunting from birth.

In order for them to form the emotional callouses necessary to shoot at live animals, it would be wise to avoid the usual cutesy baby animal decor that most parents (softies!) choose for nurseries.

A screencap of a pin of a baby crib with camo sheets and pillow.

I love the little baby bunny peaking out of the camo headboard cover. Animal-spotting practice for the wilderness!

Here’s where I begin to think that hunting theme for baby is a bad idea: the traveling camoflauge baby carrier.

Disclaimer: I do not, personally, own any babies, and I don’t spend a lot of time with them. They smell.

However.

From what I know, babies are small and crafty and will use the easily-misplaced camoflauge car seat cover to escape. Babies are devious and misplaceably tiny enough without covering them in a fabric designed to  hide. Especially if that fabric is able to zip all the way up, cocooning your baby in a cave where, out of your watchful gaze, it can come up with diabolical baby escape plans.

Also, animals might mistake your baby, in its natural-looking surroundings, for their own kind, and your baby could be stolen and raised by racoons. Just a thought.

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