Separation of right- and left-wing pinners

25 Jun

Ready to be disabused of two deeply-held assumptions?

Assumption 1: Did you think that Pinterest, the girly social platform, was all recipes and gossip and ribbons? Like a womens’ book club? Much like a book club, Pinterest is not, in fact, all pretty pictures and typography. Women also hold serious conversations / gloves-off boxing matches about religion and politics, in which a more conservative, Bible-reading contingent clash with liberal-leaning, secular women, producing HIGHLY entertaining comment wars.

Assumption 2: Do you think that God is a kind, loving, gentle giant in the sky? You would be incorrect. God is a passive-aggressive little biotch who loves nothing more than delivering a good burn, according to a religulous quote pinned by Amy Satterwhite. The one, true, very frat boy-like God, according to Amy:

A moving GIF image of someone saying Oh Snap, with the words Oh Snap written over top.

The pin that launched a thousand angry comments?

A comment war erupts on Pinterest after someone pins a quote saying God, why do you allow violence in schools? God replies: Because I'm not allowed in schools.

Yep, so, God ordered the violence in schools to teach all of us secular, church-and-state-separation-loving heathens a lesson about what happens when God is not around. See, where there’s God, there’s no violence. Where we don’t allow God, God goes in and writes a permit for mayhem. So, he is kind of in schools, but just in a really passive-aggressive, unholy way, taking out the sins of church-hating PTAs on children. Sounds like the God we all know and love!

Oh, and a round of applause for commenter Holly Mays, for bringing out the big guns. You go, Holly.

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