Huge, lush, romantic, stupid hair

23 May

How do you plan to style your hair for your forced-whimsical engagement shoot? Pinterest has tons of great ideas. Let’s start with this one, with a whopping 923+ repins, which I have christened the “Zooey Deschanel Gets the Dirty Twirlies After Four Flutes of Champagne”:

An image of an over the top, bouffant blonde hair style pinned to Pinterest

Break out the extensions, stamina and bump-its, ladies. This hairstyle requires much more than hair.

The goal of most hairstyles on Pinterest seems to be making your ‘do so big that you look tiny in comparison. Big hair–that is, bigger than your face and torso–is slimming.

But what if you want to go, GASP, even bigger?

You could try this one, which I call the “Walk of Shame: Hair Edition”:

An over the top braided hair style pinned to Pinterest. The braid is thicker than her arms.

The goal for braided hairstyles on Pinterest? The braid must be thicker than your arm. Hunger Games styles.

I have no idea how I would come up with that much hair. Maybe if I braided the hair on my back and arms, shaved it off, and worked it in, my locks would be half as full as the bouffant-braid here.

But, what if you wanted to go EVEN bigger? I have named this one “80s Faux Nostalgia Supreme”:

A picture of huge, Texas-styed hair pinned on Pinterest.

Apparently, what my hair does naturally on humid days is now in style.

Wait, wait, wait. Did I just hear you say that you want even MORE hair? Are you sure?

You asked for it.

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